Fun with Solipsism

Ah, solipsism. The ultimate in philosophical douchebaggery, solipsism posits that solipsists can't be sure that anything apart from their "self" exists at all - they may just be dreaming everything that they perceive happening to them. In essence, solipsists believe that they are God of the particular universe that they inhabit, and are only dreaming everything that happens within it.  If this is true, however, then every time a solipsist faces death, he or she faces a dilemma - either they are wrong, and the outside world does exist, or they are right, and just too lazy to go on living.

Because solipsism is almost always presented by its proponents as a search for truth, and because in death they can finally answer the question for themselves, it is clear that in an argument with a solipsist, non-solipsists who also seek truth have a duty; beat the solipsist to death with a chair. If the solipsist is correct, then you haven't actually killed them, because you don't exist. If the solipsist is wrong, though, something interesting happens; both you and the solipsist may be held to be correct. From the solipsist's point of view, the world stops existing, and so he or she was right; it is only their perception that it existed at all, and with no perception, it ceases to exist. From your point of view, the solipsist stops existing, and the problem is solved.

However, solipsists will not claim to have full control over their universe, and if pressed will likely admit that their unconscious mind must control those parts which are not directly under their control, meaning there is no functional difference between a solipsist's "unconscious mind" and everyone else's "universe". No killing necessary, unless they still won't recant, in which case it may qualify as "suicide by thought police."

::Gordon